Brown Eyed Blues*

Filed under: Random, TV — andria at 5:41 am on Thursday, September 21, 2006

*When I can’t come up with a terribly clever entry title, I use whatever title of the song I’m listening to while I post it as the title, and tonight it’s “Brown Eyed Blues” by Ben Harper. Enjoy. And, thanks to Incredipedro, my
site sends out a notification email when I update. So click on the “subscribe” link at the top of the page and sign up!!
Holy CRAP, is “Nip/Tuck” good this season. I was so disappointed last season, and this year’s episodes so far have made up for it. I love TV. Fall is my favorite time of the year, because all the fucking re-runs are gone, I can drool over John Krasinski in all new episodes of “The Office”.

Mmmmm. He’s so dreamy.

I’ve decided that as horrible and awful as high school was for me, I thank god that I don’t have to be a teenage girl now, especially after watching the new episodes of “Laguna Beach” on MTV (yes, I watch that show. Fuck off.), because those girls are just about the most vicious, nasty girls I’ve ever seen. And the most disappointing thing is that it seems like they’re happy to be the mean girls, and that people are going to see it on TV and somehow think they are people young girls should aspire to be. I don’t know if they’re all trying to make themselves out to be the next Kristin Cavalleri or what, but they’re a bunch of bitches, man (you know what, Kristin wasn’t as bad as these girls, now that I think about it).

God, I’m such a whore for the VH1and MTV shows. I just saw a preview for the next “Real World/Road Rules Challenge” and got excited.

So, Sunday, Scott and I went to see The Black Dahlia. And it was disappointing for MANY reasons - it tried WAY too hard to be a “film noir”, one of the main characters was normal one day and then insane the next, and you don’t know why, and Hilary Swank was grossly miscast as a femme fatale with an accent that I didn’t recognize, and that no other characters in the film had.

The biggest and most obvious reason this movie is crap involves the whole reason for the movie itself. I won’t go into major detail, but it all has to do with the fact that Hilary Swank’s character looked EXACTLY LIKE The Black Dahlia.

The Black Dahlia was played by Mia Kirshner. For those of you who don’t know who she is, she plays Jenny, the most annoying lesbian in the history of the world on “The L Word”.

hilaryswank.jpg

miakirshner.jpg
I don’t know about you, but as far as I can see, the only thing similar in these two women is that they both have vaginas. And it drove me crazy, because every fucking character in the movie kept saying how they looked so alike.

I really wanted to like this movie, but man - it sucked.

Dude. Seriously. If I see this fucking Audrey Hepburn-AC/DC Gap commercial one more time, I’m shooting the television.

Ok, that’s just crazy talk. I’ll probably just curse a lot.

21 Comments »

486

Comment by warcrygirl

September 21, 2006 @

You won’t believe the shit young girls are doing now. A friend of mine was telling me how some of them save IM messages from one girl, copy and paste them into another IM message to make it look like the other girl is sending it. While that alone isn’t mean, the CONTENT of the messages were appalling. Thank god I have boys; I only have two penises to worry about instead of every single penis in the tri-county area.

487

Comment by warcrygirl

September 21, 2006 @

Oh yeah, about fucking time with the subscription plug-in. :)

488

Comment by albannach

September 21, 2006 @

OH honey I’m with you on the Gap Commercial. It makes me want to Move back to England. Every time I see it, I feel bad for poor Audrey.

489

Comment by sparkspark

September 21, 2006 @

I saw the Black Dahlia the other night, and while I liked it on a certain level, the Swank/Kirshner thing was irredeemably disconcerting. I don’t understand the casting at all. And I’m with you on the Audrey Hepburn ad. It’s embarrassing. XO Violet

490

Comment by Andria

September 21, 2006 @

Warcry, no shit. I don’t know what I’d do if I had daughters now. I remember when my sister turned 18, my dad said his biggest fear in life was the he was going to see her in a “Girls Gone Wild” commercial. Thank god my only kid has four legs and meows (awww, sad).

491

Comment by Anisettekiss

September 21, 2006 @

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?
I love that commercial.

492

Comment by awittykitty

September 21, 2006 @

When I heard that Swank was playing a glamorous character I laughed. She’s like the buck toothed girl who worked at the library in high school who never had a date. (I worked at the library too, so I can say this). I also hate the Audrey Hepburn commercial. What are they selling again? She was always so classy in her movies. I think she would be embarrassed.

493

Comment by Joey

September 21, 2006 @

I’m with you on all of the reality TV.

You know what drives me NUTS on Laguna Beach? The fact that Jessica is still scamming on high school guys. I didn’t like her on last season. She comes off as so needy and pathetic. She hasn’t changed other than she looks even MORE needy and pathetic since she’s still hooking up with high school dudes. It’s like MOVE ON, go to college, get a job, something!!!!

Love the RR/RW challenges myself. Though I can say it’s not a challenge without Coral. I love how she says whatever she wants. “I don’t fight, I beat bitches UP!” Loves it!

Do you watch the #1 trashiest, skankiest reality TV show of all time Flavor of Love? If not you need to. There’s something about that show that makes me feel refreshingly normal!

494

Comment by DanjerusKurves

September 21, 2006 @

I don’t watch any of your shows … I just know that means you and the other watchers are talking trash about me. Reality hoar.

495

Comment by DanjerusKurves

September 21, 2006 @

p.s., how about now you’ve gotten the subscription deal worked out, you alphabetise your freaken links?

496

Comment by scott

September 21, 2006 @

maybe Dahlia casting was focusing on eyebrows… they got that detail “close”, anyway. the character conflict wasn’t the point that screwed me up–it was the clear-as-mud screenplay.
fear not, Joey. Miss Thing has subjected me to Flava Of Love twice, now. in fact, i’m looking into renting a tent, a camel, an Ali Baba outfit, and a pimp chalice for my next visit.
…and Audrey Hepburn is OFF LIMITS, GAP bastards!

497

Comment by Andria

September 21, 2006 @

DK, the list shuffles. If there is a way to alphabetize it, I don’t know how. I am a html tard.

Scott, don’t act like you didn’t like “Flavor of Love”, bucko. You know you did. If you show up dressed like a pimp, I’m not dressing like a hooker. And a camel ride is out of the question. That’s not the kind of, um, “hump” I had in mind.

498

Comment by Lando

September 23, 2006 @

i saw mention of vaginas, but with no links on this entry. this is obviously a mistake. please fix.

499

Comment by Ange

September 27, 2006 @

I hate-hate-hate that Audrey Hepburn commercial too! How tragic! And? I think that style of pants was best left in the past.

500

Comment by willowfox

September 28, 2006 @

a) Audrey Hepburn: Way to combine two legends and somehow make them both suck at their own game. I’m with you. DONE AND DONE with that commercial. That and who can fit into black skinny jeans? I ask you, WHO?!!??

b) ROSIE O’DONNELL?!?! Holy jeez I can’t wait!

c) John Krasinski. Sooooo hot! Soooooo hot! Want to touch the heinie!!! Oh lordy is he sighworthy! Love him!

That is all.

501

Comment by Lando

September 29, 2006 @

happy birfday, andria. hope its a good one.

Comment by Girl Gone Wild

October 3, 2007 @

Welcome and well done! I was googling and found your blog looking for Girl Gone Wild, I thought that this post, Brown Eyed Blues*, was right in line with my own thoughts on the matter.

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