Eleanor put your boots on.
A HUGE thanks to the people who clicked my link and made a donation for my 5k on the 26th. It makes me all warm and squishy inside that strangers donated money because I asked.
And if you haven’t donated, know that there are little children with inflamed bowels crying all over America. I’m just saying.
(hint)
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Today is Mr. Big Shot’s birthday (he’s the owner of the company I work for).
I have been amused by the HUNDREDS of phone calls that have come in from people hoping to suck up to him and wish him a happy birthday. Then when they find out he’s not here (just like every other fucking year, because he always takes his birthday off), they piss themselves to make sure I remember to make sure he gets the message that they called and that they wished him a happy birthday.
Here’s what every call has sounded like so far:
Me: Good morning, blahbetty blah blah company.
Them: This is (insert corporate suck ass’s name here). Can I speak to Mr. Big Shot?
Me: He’s out of the office today, can I take a message?
Them: What do you mean he’s not in the office?!? I was hoping to talk to him.
Me: Well, he’s not in today. Can I take a message?
Them: Hmmm. I was hoping to talk to him.
Me: I’ll let him know you called.
Them: This is [repeats name, because I’m apparently too retarded to remember the 6 seconds before]. PLEASE tell him that I called to wish him a happy birthday. MAKE SURE YOU WRITE HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Me: OK. I’ll give it to him.
Them: He’s going to get the message, right?
Me: Uh, yes.
Them: Don’t forget to give it to him.
Me: I’ll see if I can manage. *click*
These people are so lame.
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One of things I love about Scott is that he completely gets me, and knows what kind of weird kooky crap I like. So he sent me this:
The next time he’s here, I’m totally playing that while we’re doing it.
6 Comments »
Comment by awittykitty
August 10, 2007 @
I wonder if people will ever understand that the receptionist is actually the smartest person in the entire company. Once I was constantly getting put down by this idiot newspaper reporter who worked at our company, so I surreptitiously gave him the (whoops) wrong number for a news story he was writing. So he thinks he’s talking to some large important corporation, but instead I had given him the phone number to some local cheesy pet cemetary. HA!!! My bad!!! He didn’t even know for about 5 minutes. I was totally cracking up at my desk. Amazingly he didn’t say anything to me afterwards. High five for the “lowly” receptionist, sistah!
Comment by Meany
August 11, 2007 @
I WANT THAT ALBUM. Scott is so the shit, and if you ever break up with him, I will beat your skank ass. And now I will go donate to your cause, because I am such a goddamn pushover. (You had me at “inflamed bowels.” Tear.)
Comment by the Monk
August 11, 2007 @
i wonder what a tattoo with “Bow-chicka-bow-chicka” would look in Old English lettering, all caps? and, where to put it?!
Comment by spark and foam
August 11, 2007 @
“What do you MEAN, he’s not in the office??” Ha. How many meanings could there be?
I am super jealous of your new album.
Love,
Violet
PS, PLEASE remember to tell Mr Big Shot that I called to wish him a happy birthday! Write “happy birthday” on the message, with a heart, and… no, not a heart, like, TWO hearts, connected with an arrow, and then a unicorn. OK, like this: My name, a dash, then “HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIG SHOT!!!!” with two hearts, connected by an arrow, and a rainbow emanating from each heart, and then a unicorn with a word bubble saying “You’re the coolest!!!” Like that. And my cell phone number, with a leprechaun saying, “You can call collect!”
Comment by nogoodadddy
August 13, 2007 @
“Today is Mr. Big Shot’s birthday”
I know that was 3 days ago, but for the briefest of moments, I though that was bout me. It was my birthday and all on the 10th. And, I am a big shot…and an asshole
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Comment by warcrygirl
August 10, 2007 @
HAHAHAHA! Scott is my kind of kink. Bow-chicka-bow-chicka. People are retards. Yer welcome.