Better living through cults.
Ike loves the Jesus cup.
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In a fit of boredom at work this morning, I came across an online article about the top ten “secret” scientologists - which really weren’t secret at all. The list included:
Beck
Jason Lee (anyone who names his child Pilot Inspektor Riesgraf deserves to be in a cult that will steal your money.)
Leah Remini
Danny Masterson (who had the stupidest quote of the article [and that’s saying a lot for an article full of idiot celebrities praising a fucking CULT] saying, “I have always been in Scientology my entire life. Each service in Scientology is something I have added to my toolbox of data for living.” Toolbox of data for living? )
Greta Van Susteren
Isaac Hayes
Sonny Bono
Nancy Cartwright (voice of Bart Simpson)
Jerry Seinfeld
And, the last and most AWESOME secret scientologist - CHARLES MANSON. Anyone that recruits stupid hippies to go commit one of the most famous murders in history and then tattoos a swastika on his forehead is exactly the type of demented retard that I would assume would join the cult of scientology.
If I was some idiotic, vapid celebrity with too much money and not enough common sense (hello, Tom Cruise!), I’d run right out and join the same church that gives Charles Manson all tools in his toolbox of data for living IMMEDIATELY.
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